Dear Mr. Soanso and Mrs. Whasername,
I’m just going to lay it out bluntly for you. I suck at December. Honestly, I’m barely holding together in general, but when you toss a major holiday and three birthdays in there? I’m barely functional.
So teachers, I would like to formally apologize for the following:
- For late library books. In a more regular time of year, we always (sometimes) check to see what day it is and make sure we all have our library books in our backpacks the night before school. In December? We have no idea what day it is at all and even if we did, we have no idea where any of the library books are. We’ll get them back to you in January.
- For not sending the test back in signed. Honestly, I can’t even look at the test yet. I’m pretty sure it’s not going to be great and then I’m going to beat myself up because I should have quizzed the kids more, or bought some flashcards or something. It’s better for my current mental state that I don’t see the test. You can just keep it there.
- For incomplete homework assignments for my kindergartners. Typically we are happy to do homework, but in December it’s either practice your letter sounds or run to the store to pick up something for dinner. I know how important letter sounds are, but my kids really do like to eat.
- For late absent notes. I apologize for not bringing these in the day after the absence. But, what with mopping up vomit and trying not to inhale too deeply so as I don’t also catch the bug, (which if I did, would cause the entire structure of the household to completely collapse – you think it’s bad now?) the note must have slipped my mind. I’ll try to get it to you tomorrow.
- For the kids not wearing sneakers on gym days. Again, in December, it’s all I can do to get them on the bus, so as long as they aren’t naked, I don’t really care what they are wearing.
- And finally, for not completing December’s journal packet for the kindergartners. Although, when I received this, I do have to admit I laughed out loud. A journal. For kindergartners. Who can’t read or write yet. I just knew this wasn’t happening in December. Honestly, I’m not sure this will get done in January.
Teachers, please bear with me this December. Not only I’m I busting my butt trying to make a magical Christmas, I’m also trying to throw an extravagant birthday party for my triplets, because I feel bad that not only do they have to share a birthday with two other people, but also because I don’t want their birthday to get eclipsed by Christmas.
I hope to return to my normal self in January, where the kids will have their homework most days and be prepared for school around 80% of the time.